I like this, I hadn't listened to the earlier mix(es) but where you are
is quite nice.  My only issues with the mix decisions: the drums are too
dry, particularly the snare, relative to the vocals; I would either put
more reverb on the drums, less on the vocal, or both :).  Also, I would
like to hear more of the harmony vocal in the later verses -- it is
quite buried.
Regarding the distortion on the vocal, I can definitely hear what you
are talking about, especially later in the song.  Just because you are
not clipping doesn't mean you aren't recording too hot.  What was your
"working level" at the DAW input for recording?  What was gain staging
like throughout the signal chain between the microphone and the DAW?
What effects do you have applied to the track?
With modern equipment at 24-bit resolution and a good noise floor, "best
practice" seems to be to work at about -20 dBFS RMS until mastering.  If
you are following "tape" conventions and trying to keep levels in the -6
dBFS range with peaks hitting near clipping, you may be working outside
the best-performing range of your audio IO gear and introducing some
distortion.
As a side note, I think that DAW design encourages too-hot levels by use
of waveform displays everywhere.  If you are at a good level of -20
dBFS, your signal is at about 1/10 of the full range, which is hardly
visible on a DAW waveform display if it's small.  "I can't see the
signal... turn it up!"  -6 dBFS gets up to half the amplitude range, and
if you are "seeing" waveforms near the full range of the wave display,
you are somewhere around -1 dBFS, which is .89 of total range... way too
high for working levels!
Good work on the piece, and thanks for sharing it!
Thanks,
Bill Gribble
On Thu, 2013-05-02 at 19:01 +0100, James Stone wrote:
  Thanks everyone!
 This is my "improved" mix - based on comments here, and some more
 tweaking! Not sure my skills are up to all the suggestions that were
 made, but this is to the best of my ability:
 
https://soundcloud.com/jmstone/m/download/s-SIyAE
 By the way, I am not sure if my condenser mic is breaking - the vocals
 sound a bit distorted despite being recorded at below clipping levels
 - any experts here care to comment?
 My friend is very happy with it, and is planning to submit it to a
 local Nepali radio station  in the UK - so we will see what comes of
 it.
 No plans to record an album or anything - the guitar/bass player is
 back in Nepal now..
 Incidentally, the two of them were relatively famous in the 90s in
 Nepal with a song they recorded together, but apparently no recordings
 of it are left (they were recorded onto cassette and distributed to
 radio stations, but never released)..
 James
 On Thu, May 2, 2013 at 5:48 PM, Set Hallstrom <sakrecoer(a)gmail.com>
 wrote:
         Very cosy music!
         I'd like to advise you to follow Q's advice, but make an
         exception on
         the snare+bassdrum and the bassguitar.
         I think the vocal level is good, but perhaps i would think
         different if
         i understood what he says (beautyfull language btw)
         Thanks for the music! Feel free to ad my email to any release
         anouncment
         list.
         *Set
         On 2013-05-01 23:36, Q wrote:
  Probably a bit of everything -- might be as easy
to do it on 
         the master
  bus.
 Q
 On 01/05/13 22:32, James Stone wrote:
> Thanks for listening, and thanks for the comments.. I will 
         continue
 > tweaking :)
>
> What were you thinking I could cut low-mids from?
>
> James
>
> On Wed, May 1, 2013 at 8:20 PM, Q <lists(a)quirq.ukfsn.org
> <mailto:lists@quirq.ukfsn.org>> wrote:
>
>     On 01/05/13 09:27, James Stone wrote:
>
>         HI Everyone,
>
>         Here is a song I recorded with a friend of mine who 
         is a
Nepalese
 >         singer, and one of his friends who
played the 
         guitar and bass
 > on the
>         track. It has taken me ages to get round to 
         finishing it,
 >         because I was
>         having real troubles coming up with some drums that 
         fitted the
 >         song OK.
>
>         This is the current version, mixed in Mixbus. I 
         would
 > appreciate any
>         thoughts on the song, and also the mix.
>
> 
         https://soundcloud.com/__jmstone/roughmix2/download/s-__qgo8P
 > 
<https://soundcloud.com/jmstone/roughmix2/download/s-qgo8P>
 > 
         >>         James
 > 
> 
         >>     Hi
 > 
         >>     Just had a listen
to this and it sounds pretty nice as
         it stands.
 > 
         >>     You could
probably clear out the low mids a little to
         improve
 >     clarity, but don't overdo it or
you'll lose too much 
         warmth.
 > 
         >>     The vocal drops
in and out a bit, especially early on
         (I think it's
 >     probably the lower register bits that are
most 
         affected). I guess
 >     it'd probably be better to automate
the volume rather 
         than compress,
 >     although some light compression
mightn't go astray. The 
         guitar has a
 >     tendency to overpower the vocal as well,
but it might 
         be okay once
 >     the vocal level is higher, but if not,
maybe EQ the 
         guitar a bit to
         >>     reduce the clash.
 > 
         >>     The main guitar
solo (from 3.10) needs to be more
         upfront I'd say,
 >     lose a lot of the reverb and it'd be
a lot better. 
         Perhaps use some
 >     delay to make it big without pushing it
into the 
         background like the
 >     reverb's doing. It's a bit thin
sounding as well and 
         the level a bit
         >>     inconsistent.
 > 
         >>     It's a
pleasant sounding piece, nice and mellow. Nice
         playing and
 >     the singer's got a good voice.
However, with not being 
         able to infer
 >     any emotional intensity from the vocals,
it all sounds 
         a bit flat,
 >     on the same level -- the piece could do
with some 
         contour to it, a
         >>     sense of building and releasing in the music.
 > 
> 
         >>     Q
 > 
         >
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